How to Be Prepared and Not Scared with Robyn Warner
Robyn Warner is known by many as @aflyonmywall on Instagram, but along with her goofy outlook on her relatable everyday life, she is serious about teaching women and families how to fight back in self-defense in events we hope will never happen. Here’s a special post where we learn how to be prepared and not scared with Robyn Warner.
Robyn’s passion for educating women and families in self-defense stems from her own attack when she was just 18 years old. A man violently approached Robyn in broad daylight and sexually assaulted her when she was out for an afternoon run. Can you imagine? How many times have we thought we were exempt from something like this happening to us? That’s how Robyn felt too, until it happened to her.
What Robyn Learned from Her Attack
I’ll give a brief overview of Robyn’s attack, but it’s really much more raw and heart wrenching hearing the entire story from Robyn’s own voice. So, please check out the podcast episode for it! (Plus, she gives a freebie at the end you won’t want to miss!)
Robyn claims what saved her life is remembering a few self-defense techniques she was taught as a 12-year-old girl. She never thought she would use them, but she’s forever grateful they popped in her head at the exact right moments.
In the middle of Robyn’s attack, she realized just trying to get away from the attacker and run away wasn’t working. Any time she was about to run, he would grab her again. She needed to fight back, but how when he was over 6 feet tall and over half her size?
She used the self-defense technique to go for the breeder or the breather. First, when he was on top of her she kneed him right in the groin which allowed her to break free and stand up. Then, it was attacking his face that allowed her to ultimately get away. (She stabbed him in the eye as hard as she could and then shoved her two fingers to the back of his mouth.)
Robyn had several gut feelings that day she was attacked not to go running alone, not to go to that location, etc. She realized afterward that it was her intuition trying to save her. She kept fighting the feeling back with logic thinking, “Don’t be so scared, Robyn. People go running by themselves all the time. This is a crowded trail, nothing will happen in the middle of the day.” Sometimes it’s hard to know which feeling is right, but if it comes from your gut, you should trust it!
How to be Prepared and Not Scared
Robyn teaches some basics that we can all start doing today to help us be more aware and prepared for an attack. She gives weekly tips over on her Instagram and she goes into a lot more detail in her course that you can take in the comfort of your own home.
Step #1: Take advantage of tools to keep you safe.
A good rule of thumb is to always use the buddy system. Although this is something we learn as kids, this is a system you will never outgrow. If for some reason, you can’t have a buddy with you, make sure to at least share your location with a spouse or other close friend. That way they know where you are and how to get a hold of you.
Another safety tip is to keep a self-defense weapon with you at all times. This could be pepper spray, a pocket knife, or whatever feels most comfortable to you. You could even practice with it, so you know how to use it in a real attack.
Step #2: Trust your instincts.
As said earlier, this is what Robyn wished she would’ve done. If you have the slightest feeling that something isn’t right or you feel scared, don’t feel bad about it–trust it! It’s so easy to second guess yourself, but it’s ALWAYS better to follow your instincts.
Step #3: Take a self-defense course.
If you want to go all in on this self-defense training, you can take a course. You could look into local classes in your community, or you could take Robyn’s online course. It’s a series of videos that total to just over 5 hours. Once you buy the course, it is available to you for the rest of your life.
You could invite friends over to take the course with you! Robyn even suggests watching it with your kids who are 11 or older. You can also watch it on your own and then teach some of the techniques to your kids. Robyn is giving a special offer of $25 off if you use the code “CAKE” when purchasing her course. This is a very generous deal, and well worth every penny.
Quick Tips for Self-Defense
- Tip 1: Go for the breeder or the breather. Go for the face (eyes, nose, mouth), but the groin is the best spot.
- Tip 2: Don’t just scream noises, yell out your name, location, and what’s happening. (Example: Robyn Warner, Canyon Trail, I’m being raped!)
- Tip 3: Don’t just try to run away, you have to fight back.
- Tip 4: Give yourself permission to be mean or rude if the occasion calls for it.
How to Teach your Kids about Safety
Robyn has a program called Kid S.A.F.E. where she teaches how to teach your kids about being safe. She lets go of the old term “stranger danger” and instead uses “tricky people.” (Tune into the podcast to learn how to easily introduce this term to your young kids.)
She changed the term because now, it’s statistically more likely for people who are not strangers to harm your children. Robyn wants to make sure her kids (and all kids) know they can come to their parents no matter what. The key is to be open and honest about what could happen and what to do when it does. This is what will make your kids feel safe to come to talk to you as the parent.
Robyn keeps a list of what tricky people look like or act like and shares it with her kids. For example, tricky people keep you from mom and dad. She keeps it simple the first time she teaches it with kids starting at age 3. She then reviews it with her kids every quarter, adding more detail as they get older.
If this is something you’ve thought about, but weren’t sure how to implement it into your conversations at home, check out Robyn’s program here. She also has free tips for it on her Instagram @aflyonmywall.
For Those of You Who Have Been Attacked
It is one of the hardest things to come back into your everyday life after being attacked. Right after it happened to Robyn, she remembers crying every day. Thinking it was her fault, she never wanted to talk about it and she physically couldn’t speak about it out loud.
During her counseling sessions, any time her counselor tried to get her to tell the story of the attack, Robyn would just burst into tears. Then, the counselor told her that the sooner she could talk about it the sooner she would heal.
It was then that Robyn decided she was going to be the victor, not the victim. She was not going to let this one moment define the rest of her life. Over time (and a lot of self-work and healing) she got better. She got to the point where she could share her story without emotions keeping her from doing so.
Robyn even said she’s glad she carries this experience because so many people have told her, “What you taught me saved my life.” That’s all she wants.
Imagining you or your child in danger can feel really heavy! It’s definitely hard to think about, let alone learn about on purpose. However, Robyn pointed out if you were to take her course, you won’t feel afraid anymore.
This is a pretty raw post, but I’m so glad I got to have this interview. I hope you learned how to be prepared and not scared with Robyn Warner! Don’t forget to follow Robyn on Instagram @aflyonmywall. Also, you can follow me @cakebycourtney if you want tips on making the best cakes of your life!
You can sign up for Robyn’s self-defense course here and don’t forget to use the code “CAKE” for $25 off!